We’ve talked about dressing the part and not looking like you just rolled out of bed, but what about how you handle yourself aside from your appearance? The way you communicate, look others in the eye and empower them to purchase or sell homes is important, too.

Assuming your next client is a friendly yet stressed buyer or seller, use the following methods to win them over.

Don’t be afraid to show a little passion.

Ever get out of a really empowering speech or brainstorming session? Remember the inspirational and motivating sense you carry with you directly after, sort of like you could go out and conquer the world? Obviously, a showing isn’t a TED talk, but exhibiting some enthusiasm can’t hurt.


  • Express delight: “I’m pleased to be working with you.”
  • Promote yourself: “With my expertise, I have no doubt we can find a solution that fits your needs.”


  • Ask them to take the reins: “Um, we could probably contact the listing agent, unless you want to do that.”
  • Be a know-it-all: “You’re never going to get your asking price, trust me.”

You want people to feel energized after working with you, not drained. This isn’t a business for the shy.

Make a joke; real estate is fun!

Well … not all the time, but what’s the harm in keeping things light? People gravitate toward cheerful personalities, even when they’re doing business. If things go well, you’ll be spending a lot of time together. Making yourself likable can boost retention and establish a loyal client base.

If you’re not naturally humorous, it’s easy to cross the line. Be appropriate — making jokes doesn’t have to be at someone’s expense. Don’t speak negatively about other agents or people you are working with throughout the buying, selling or renting process, including lenders, property managers and other related professionals.

Certainly don’t deflect blame in the way of a joke, or you’ll look petty.

On the opposite end, making fun of yourself might get the crowd going, but you don’t want to discredit your professional persona. You can talk about your quirks, but defer your self-deprecation to matters unrelated to the job.

Go away — you’re being awkward.

Although many sellers and laws require you to be present when showing a home, don’t hover or make comments about the place like you’re moving in with your buyer. Giving your expertise on home specifics is appreciated, but your personal opinion on wallpaper is unnecessary.

Aside from not physically trailing them, don’t send too many emails. As much as you want them to be, your client isn’t obligated to use you or your resources.

If they aren’t interested and stop replying, send three to four follow-ups and move on. While it’s incredibly stressful to lose a client after weeks of working with them, it’s part of being an agent. Whatever you do, don’t burn bridges or insult them. 

Remember, you have to feel out the vibe before you know how this relationship will take course. Don’t start acting like immediate best friends or they might think you’re a phony. Alternatively, don’t play “hard to get” thinking this is a dating game.

Email Jennifer Riner.

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