Re: ‘Rookie Realtor spouse speaks out‘ (May 10)

Dear Rookie:

The spouse is correct to encourage his wife to get a steady income if she’s going to work outside of the home. He sounds like a good sport and supportive of her efforts to get on her feet in her new endeavor; however, there comes a time when support becomes enabling of a nonproductive enterprise.

I know, because it happened to me. My spouse became burnt out with paying for my desk costs and gasoline expenses, while he and the kids suffered with evening and weekend calls from customers, late meals, missed school activities, and a tired wannabe Realtor for a wife-mother.

I finally got out of sales and into a “steady” job as a real estate appraiser. Spouse is happy; dog is happy; kids are grown now; and this ex-wannabe only complains about too much work these days. For the sake of her family and marriage, the newbie Realtor should listen to her husband. (He sounds like a good one.)

Lucia Goheen
Azalea, Ore.

Dear Rookie:

I’ve been at this 10 years and am considered successful. I am usually in the top one or two in my company of 120 agents. This can be a brutal business, and I couldn’t have done it when my kids were small. I have already lost one marriage to real estate. I would encourage the agent to consider his family first, learn from my mistakes!

Jim Serino
Century21 Heritage
Westford, Mass.

Dear Rookie:

This is directed toward the Rookie’s spouse. I’m not going to tell you that you are being unsupportive, I actually agree with you to an extent. I have been doing real estate now for almost two years, and have only closed four deals, two of which were a family member.

Suddenly, things are starting to pick up and things are beginning to roll. But there are days when I wonder if all the time spent running around like a chicken with my head cut off and missing family functions is worth it. Somewhere deep inside I know it will pay off, but it is definitely hard. And it does take a toll on my husband. I have had to supplement our income with regular jobs and if I had quit a full-time job in which we relied on my income to do this, I would’ve been out of the game a long time ago.

Sounds like it’s time to prioritize, and maybe you’re right, hang up and move on to something else. But it has to be your spouse’s decision because you don’t want them to ever regret quitting the business and resenting you for it. Best of luck!

Christine Lavulo

Got tips, ideas or advice for the Rookie Realtor? Send them to Rookie@inman.com.

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