Even when your life is chaotic and full of tension, you can take steps to have as many happy and productive moments as possible. The more of these you have, the better your 2020 will be.

As we wrap up 2019, reflect on whether it was a happy year for you or one that was filled with frustration and anger. Even when your life is chaotic and full of tension, you can take steps to have as many happy and productive moments in your life as possible. The more of these you have, the better your 2020 will be.

Start the day by being positive

What do you say to yourself as soon as you wake up in the morning? Do you tell yourself it’s going to be a great day? Or do you focus on everything that is going wrong? To put yourself in a positive mood the moment you get up in the morning, get up, stretch, smile, and say, “What a great day!” If you have a spouse or partner, tell him or her, “Good morning honey—I love you.”

“Eat that frog” as early as possible each day

This comes from Brian Tracy’s book, Eat that Frog, where he defines the “frog” as being the biggest, ugliest task of the day. Make a point of putting the “frog” at the top of your to-do list. That way, it won’t be hanging over you all day.

Is it time to rid of those “junkers?”

Imagine that you have an old, beat “junker” in your garage. The only way to make room for a shiny new convertible is to get rid of the old car that is taking up space. The same is true with difficult or unrealistic clients. Dump them or fire them, but the sooner you get rid of them, the better. You can’t attract higher quality clients if you don’t have room for them in your business.

Trust that the right things happen in your life—even when it hurts

We all have times when we are in pain. It can be an illness, a hurtful situation, or even a physical injury. In most cases, painful events are some of the most meaningful things that happen to us. Here are four ways to weather the storm.

  • When you experience a painful situation ask, “What can I learn from this?”
  • Is there something about this situation that I can find funny right now or in the future? Laugh if you can. It increases your endorphins which also block your pain.
  • Stay focused on what you can do right now to alleviate the pain or improve the situation. Baby steps are better than no steps at all.
  • Keep in mind that when you’re on the right path, the doors open easily. If you keep bumping into obstacle after obstacle, it’s time to change directions.

Take a bite rather than insisting on having the whole thing

Instead of longing for it all, such as having a fancy ski boat and becoming frustrated that you can’t afford it, why not experience what you’re longing for on a smaller scale than you can access now. For example, you could buy a smaller boat or rent a boat to enjoy sailing or water skiing now.

When “normal” feels amazing

Everyone has ups and downs. The point to remember is that when you experience life’s toughest blows, merely getting back to normal feels amazing. If you’ve ever had a migraine or a broken bone, you know how great it feels when your head stops hurting or when you no longer have to wear a cast. While it may not be easy, appreciate what you learn during these times and appreciate those times when everything works, and nothing hurts.

Be strategic about where you direct your attention

Due to a structure that neurologists have nicknamed “mother,” your brain can only focus on one thing at a time. For example, when something makes you laugh, you temporarily block out everything else including that makes you sad. To have your best year ever in 2020, be strategic about where you direct your attention. If something drains your energy such as watching TV, shift to a different activity such as reading a book, exercising, gardening, or doing something that invigorates you.

When work alone is not enough

Workaholics often feel betrayed when their work doesn’t make them happy or others fail to appreciate what they do. If you’re experiencing this gap, you can fill it by volunteering, coaching a sports team, or doing anything else that helps another person. The point is: When you help others, you help yourself.

“Taste the kitchen”

To describe how they approach life, our next door neighbors coined the phrase, “Taste the kitchen.” It refers to taking every possible opportunity to experience as much of life as possible. This can be trying a new food, traveling to a foreign destination, ziplining in a forest. Life is an adventure — enjoy it to the fullest!

Be definite with the infinite

My husband has used this saying for years as a version of “be careful of what you wish for.” Back in April of 2007, I was in the midst of a big move, I had a consulting contract that was taking me to L.A. every week, plus I was about to hold my very first Awesome Females in Real Estate Conference. I kept saying, “I wish I could take a break,” “I wish I could start the contract in California a week later,” and “I wish I didn’t have to deal with the move.” Well, I got everything I wished for—I got my “break.” I fell and broke my arm. I was getting a cast put on it when I should have been on a plane to L.A., and I obviously could do next to nothing in terms of the move.

When you’re feeling overwhelmed

Sooner or later, we all experience times where we feel overwhelmed. When this happens to you, remember this quote from Buddha: “You cannot add tea to a cup that is still full.”

To have your best year ever in 2020, fill your cup with wonderful people, “taste the kitchen,” laugh, and give back to others.

Happy New Year!

Bernice Ross, President and CEO of BrokerageUP and RealEstateCoach.com, is a national speaker, author and trainer with over 1,000 published articles. Learn about her broker/manager training programs designed for women, by women, at BrokerageUp.com and her new agent sales training at RealEstateCoach.com/newagent.

Are you ready for what the industry holds in 2020? Inman Connect New York is your key to unlocking opportunity in a changing market. At Connect you will gain insight into the future, discover new strategies and network with real estate’s best and brightest to accelerate your business. Create your 2020 success story at Inman Connect New York, January 28-31, 2019.

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