Video killed the radio star. AI killed my confidence

I did not realize how dependent I had become on ChatGPT until my business partner pointed it out. At first, it felt harmless. Productive, even. I used it for cleaning up emails, organizing thoughts, rewriting captions, brainstorming social posts, having difficult conversations, recruiting messages and all the normal things people use AI for now.

I also used it to help me build out some really cool tech and automations for our brokerage. I named it Chad and even gave him a face. 

Becoming dependent on AI feedback

At some point, I got weird about it. I’d write a text message, paste it into ChatGPT, and compare the answers to see which one sounded better. Looking back, that’s ridiculous and really embarrassing.

My business partner eventually called me out on it. She told me I didn’t sound like myself anymore. Not just online. In conversations, too. I laughed it off at first, but she was right.

For years, people came to me for advice on communication, branding, real estate, writing, all of it. My entire career was built around talking to people, solving problems, and fixing “the things” for other people. Then suddenly I was second-guessing basic emails.

• “Can you rewrite this?”
• “Does this sound professional?”
• “Can you make this better?”

I started filtering every thought through AI before another human being saw it. I mean, of course, it always sounded cleaner, more polished, more “correct.” But it also stopped sounding like me.

I have never been a perfectly polished internet personality. If you saw my Facebook posts from 2010 or some of my old TikToks, you would probably physically cringe. My most viral content was me wearing my CPAP and me with a bad haircut.

But at least I sounded human. I had a personality. Opinions. Weirdness. Now I’m struggling to find my voice because everybody online sounds the same.

Back in 2008, Nicholas Carr wrote an article for The Atlantic called Is Google Making Us Stupid? At the time, people rolled their eyes at it. His argument was simple: technology changes the way we think. Now, studies are suggesting that AI might be doing something similar.

WIRED recently covered research showing that people using AI tools completed tasks faster but struggled more once the AI support disappeared. That hit me immediately because I could see parts of myself in it. I do not necessarily think AI makes people stupid, but I do think this AI dependence is changing people and not in a positive way.

I think filtering every thought through AI eventually made me stop trusting my own instincts. Somewhere along the line, I stopped sitting with my own thoughts long enough to fully develop them. And eventually, I realized I was afraid to post on social media without asking a robot for approval first, which is a wild place to end up emotionally.

I still use AI every single day. I probably always will. It is incredible for systems, automation, organization, brainstorming and backend operations. But I think we crossed into dangerous territory once people started outsourcing their personality, too.

Are you too dependent on AI?

If you’re starting to wonder whether this is happening to you, ask yourself a few questions:

• Have you stopped posting something because AI didn’t like it?
• Are you asking AI to help with decisions you used to make on your own?
• Do you run texts, emails, or social media posts through AI multiple times before sending them?
• Would you feel uncomfortable publishing something without asking AI to review it first?
• Can you still tell the difference between your voice and AI’s voice?
• Could you explain your last post, article, or opinion out loud in a company meeting without AI helping you find the words?
• If someone compliments your writing, does part of you feel like you don’t deserve the credit?
• Most importantly, if someone met you in real life tomorrow, would they recognize the person they’ve been following online?

Some of the best people I know are imperfect. They ramble. They interrupt themselves. They tell weird stories. They sometimes say things the wrong way. That is part of being human, right? I’ll be honest, I still do it. I still catch myself looking for AI validation before trusting my own thoughts sometimes, and that is a weird thing to admit out loud.